Do you struggle with being a happy homemaker? I think, this is something we all struggle with on any given day and sometimes multiple times a day.
There can be so much chaos that comes with managing a home and even managing our own time well. It seems like I’m faced with the truth every day that a woman’s work is never done.
Now there are many other things that could cause us to struggle with being happy whether it’s circumstances, lack of sleep, or little annoyances.
Thankfully, we don’t have to stay in this place of struggling with happiness. There are many things we can do to help us fight off unhappiness and truly enjoy the days and tasks God has given us in our home.
Here are my nine top tips that help me to be a happy homemaker!
Come from a place of peace.
My best days are almost always the ones where I got up on time and did my simple morning routine. When I get some time alone before the day of homemaking starts, it always seems to go better.
I’m more at peace and things are more in order which helps me serve my family from a place of peace even if we encounter chaotic things. If I’m at peace starting out, the day is more likely to be peaceful and I have strength and energy to create a peaceful place for them.
It is hard to get that time though especially with little ones. I have found it very encouraging that if I get that peaceful time most of the time, then when it gets interrupted, it’s not as big of a deal if it occasionally doesn’t happen for whatever reason.
The struggle to get this habit started is not easy though. There are always seasons where I have to set it aside like during the newborn season and prioritize rest, but I try to get back to it as soon as possible.
It’s never perfect, it’s rarely glorious, but striving to find peace for myself helps to create and share peace for others that I encounter during the day.
Stop and smell the roses.
If you have real roses or have fresh flowers in the house, make a habit of stopping and appreciating their beauty and scent.
It’s OK if you don’t have real flowers though. The principal still applies.
Every once in a while throughout the day, it’s good to stop and appreciate beauty and goodness. Being grateful for what you have and finding things to be grateful for about less than wonderful circumstances can actually cause you to be happy in spite of what’s going on around you.
Bless your children.
This is something I recently started. We are in the thick of the toddler years where it is really easy to get frustrated and struggle with taking care of the children all day by myself.
On my little boy’s second birthday, I decided that I was going to tell him happy birthday 100 times through out the day. I only made it to about 60, but I experienced something interesting. Telling him something good over and over again did not necessarily change his behavior, but it did change how I viewed situations. Choosing to say something positive to him no matter how I actually felt gave me the grit to be virtuous even though I didn’t feel like it. The change was in me not necessarily in him right at first.
In that same time, I was listening to a podcast with Sally Clarkson, the homemaking heroine of us all, and she was talking about purposefully blessing her children.
This has become a helpful practice that helps me enjoy the company of my children. I strive to bless them with the literal words.
Occasionally, I’ll choose a specific phrase to tell them every time I start to struggle.
For example…
- I’m so thankful for you!
- This is a good day because God made it!
- I love you!
- You are such a big helper!
- I appreciate you!
I know it does wonders for my children to hear those words from me, but it also does wonders for my own heart to intentionally stop and give them goodness.
Eat some chocolate.
Sometimes, I struggle with being happy because I’m stressed and for whatever reason something sweet helps even things out. A little chocolate can’t hurt you and I have actually found that it does more good then harm in many stressful situations especially on emotional days.
Yes, I’m totally telling you to eat some chocolate. It will do you good and help you smile.
Sing a song.
Praise changes the way you think about things. When you choose to sing the goodness of God in spite of how you might really feel, it will change you. God gets glory when we sing and when we make a sacrifice of thanksgiving to him.
It really is a sacrifice. When we are happy and all is going well, it doesn’t take much for us to want to sing, but in the moments when we aren’t feeling it, that’s when we need it most. It is hard, but it is virtuous and so wonderful.
(Your children will love it, too!)
Enjoy the company of your children.
Being happy about constantly being in the presence of those who demand so much of us is hard. It isn’t always the thing that brings us the most joy, but they are little souls who need happiness, too.
Sometimes I wish my children could hold up a sign when they are having a rough day that says “I’m not happy because you aren’t happy.” Being directly faced with my own lack of virtue sometimes helps me realize it sooner and do something about it.
Perhaps, these little ones are the instruments of God to refine us and teach us how to be virtuous. Maybe they were given to us to be little companions in life for the good and the bad and that their presence can be enjoyed for who they are rather than only being enjoyed when they are being good.
Could it be that their acting up is an opportunity for us to be refined and learn how to happy no matter what is going on?
Create something.
We are all given interests in some area that we can be creative. Maybe it’s sewing a ruffle, painting a lamp, or maybe just making some simple hand soap. Perhaps, it’s experimenting in the kitchen with a new recipe that you found. You know what you like to do.
Creating things with our hands brings a simple happiness that can light up our day. You should try it. Next time you aren’t feeing so happy, try to find a way that you can create something. It is very fulfilling!
(Random thought – God created the world and saw that it was good. I wonder if we would find more goodness if we created things more.)
Know when to stop.
Sometimes, my unhappiness comes from overdoing the housework. There is always more to do and the work isn’t going any where. It helps to recognize when we are nearing the end of our energy and to simply sit down with some chocolate or an adrenal cocktail and recoup.
It takes a little bit to learn when you need to stop, but it can help you from stretching yourself too thin.
Embrace the seasons.
Not every season is the same. Some seasons are just plain harder than others. Embracing the times that are harder and preparing ourselves the best we can in the morning for the days in these seasons can really help them be easier.
Recognizing the hardness and doing what we can to avoid making it harder than it has to be can helps us enjoy these seasons much more.
Final Thoughts!
Being a happy homemaker does not always come naturally. It takes some intentional work, but it is attainable. It is possible to be a happy homemaker in spite of the chaos and endless work. There are lots of simple things that you can do to help you be a happier.
Ultimately, it is God that gives the happiness. Make sure you are truly grateful for the times when all is going well, but know that God can give you joy even in the hard seasons when it is especially hard to even want to be virtuous.
I have been learning a lot about improving my systems around the house to avoid chaos. Tweaking little things here and there over time make huge improvements. Here are some of my tips:
You can also learn more about virtue and becoming a more virtuous woman, too.
I truly hope this was a help to you! It was refreshing personally to stop and think about these things again. If you found it helpful, please share it with others! You can also spread the word by pinning it. Simply by pinning it will help more people see it, too!
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